Cut the crap. Give me a drink.

Congratulations to Mike Matheny.  The St. Louis Cardinals have hired their former catcher as the team's next manager.  It'll be tough to replace Tony LaRussa, that's for sure.

Theo Epstein is now OFFICIALLY the GM of the Chicago Cubs.  

Congratulations to you, Derrek Lee, for escaping Baltimore.

Paul McCartney might do a concert at Wrigley this summer.  Sweet!

Yesterday was fun.  I played hooky and went to the Cubs home opener.  There's nothing quite like the excitement of Opening Day.  It's a feeling that just can't be repeated anywhere else.

It ended up being a bit of a tough game as the Cubbies ended up losing to the Pirates, but there's still 160 games to go.  The Cubs already won this afternoon, so they're 1-1 right now.

P.S. Robert Redford (The Natural) threw out the ceremonial first pitch.  Kinda cool.

A massive storm system bringing heavy snow, sleet, and freezing rain could potentially impact 100 million people as it slams the Rockies, Plains, and Midwest regions early this week before traveling to the eastern seaboard Wednesday, according to forecasts on Sunday.

Looks like we'll be getting more snow.

Hall of Fame outfielder Tony Gwynn says he cancer in a salivary gland.

The San Diego Union-Tribune reported Saturday that the parotid cancer was discovered last month.

The 50-year-old Gwynn faces radiation and chemotherapy treatments. He says doctors have told him they feel they caught the cancer early and “there was not much of it there.”

The cancer was diagnosed after the former Padres star had a third round of surgery since 1997 to remove a tumor on the parotid gland. The previous procedures found no malignancies.

Gwynn is San Diego State’s baseball coach, and the school confirmed Gwynn’s condition to The Associated Press. Gwynn plans to return to his alma mater, which he has coached since 2003.

Chicago Cubs broadcaster Bob Brenly has withdrawn his name from consideration for the team's managerial job.

Tonight is the Dave Matthews (with Jason Mraz) concert at WRIGLEY FIELD!  Very excited.  It's gonna be great.

Kerry Wood's troubles continue.  The Indians placed the closer on the disabled list with a blister on his right index finger. It is his second DL stint of the season.

It's a shame, really.  He was so talented and promising when he was with the Cubs, but then it seemed that he had injury after injury after injury.  I'd love to see him get it together.

Cubs pitcher Carlos Zambrano has once again let his temper get the best of him, and this time he's been suspended indefinitely.  This might be the end for him as a Cub.  Usually when the higher-ups send a guy home early (Sammy Sosa, Milton Bradley), he doesn't come back. 

I'm running out of patience with him, and I fear the Cubs organization may be as well.  This time he got into a fight with HIS OWN TEAMMATE.  He starts going after Derrek Lee and had to be restrained.  He's out of control.

It's a shame, really.  Zambrano is a hell of a pitcher, and a big part of the Cubs, but he's gotta get it in check if he wants to continue.

I took in a ballgame yesterday at Wrigley.  My first of the year, as a matter of fact.  They lost to the Astros.  Ugh.  Don't get me wrong, I still had a great time.  I'd just like to have my boys win.

Last week, North Carolina eBay user lace_thongs35 thought she was putting up an everyday, 80s-era Nintendo Entertainment System (together with five games) on eBay. But less than an hour after the first bid, the price was over $6,000 -- and on Wednesday, when the auction closed, the final selling price topped $13,000.

Why? Not the console itself, but one of the games bundled with it -- a deeply obscure 1987 release called Stadium Events, a highly sought-after collectors' item. But it wasn't even the game itself that was worth the bulk of the money -- it was the original cardboard box, which collectors value at a breathtaking $10,000. Fewer than 10 complete copies of the game are thought to exist, and retro gaming aficionados consider it one of the hardest-to-find NES games ever made.

Not a bad way to make a good chunk of money!

There's some news about former Red Sox star Ted Williams that, if true, is pretty damn disturbing.

After Williams's death in 2002, his son had his body cryogenicly frozen.  Now a former executive at the facility where Williams is being kept has come out with a book claiming that "a technician took baseball-like swings at Williams' frozen head with a monkey wrench."

Eww.  That's just shocking and horrifying enough that I could actually believe it to be true.  People are sick.

I really hate when the Cubs lose.  Especially when they lose to the Cardinals.  Now we're 11 games behind them in the standings, and I just don't think it's possible to catch up.  Another disappointing season, to be sure.  Stupid curse.